Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Conversations with Cathy, part 6

Me: I've finally figured it out.

Cathy (yawning): Finally figured out what, babe?

Me: All the times in the last couple of years when I've said dumb things or taken a long time to figure stuff out or had lapses in concentration. I finally know why.

Cathy: Because you're crazy?

Me: No because you're crazy. It's not early Alzheimer's. It's you.

Cathy: How on earth is your lack of concentration my fault.

Me: Because you do crazy things. Cute crazy things, I admit, but crazy all the same. And you're always impressed that I just take it in stride. I was always a bit puzzled how well I was taking it, figuring it ought to freak me out more. But now I know!

Cathy: Are you going to tell me, or can I just roll over and go to sleep?

Me: Because even while I, on the face of it, was handling the strangeness, some part of my brain was trying to process it, trying to figure it out. Trying to determine why you're acting that way, is there any way of predicting the wacky behaviour. That sort of thing. And the longer I've known you, the more of my brain space and power is now being diverted to trying to figure you out. It's there in the background of my brain. In the subconcious, merrily spinning away, growing larger.

Cathy: So you're saying I'm a computer virus?

Me: (having a sudden burst of brain activity and figuring out that calling my wife a virus may not be a good idea). Noooo....more like a cute and addicitive computer program that keeps taking up more and more of the available space.

Cathy: Nice save.

Me: Thanks.

Cathy: So, any fix to the solution of your malfunctioning brain?

Me: I'm not sure. I'll have to think on it some more.

Cathy: Good luck with that. (rolls over and goes to sleep)

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