Cathy: (upon reading Dups latest adventures in the wilderness) Well, that settles it. I'm never going on vacation with Dups.
Craig: I didn't think his latest adventures were that bad.
Cathy: He went camping with Mike in sub-zero temperatures in the middle of nowhere Alberta without any food.
Craig: Well, bad for Dups. Not so much for Mike. Dups is a vegetarian, Mike isn't. If worse had come to worse, I like Mike's odds better.
Cathy: And they tried to break Ted (Martin)'s record for most number of Golden Hammers (Strongbow with a shot of whiskey) consumed in an evening.
Craig: Admittedly, that's a bit worrying. Ted, in his prime, had the liver of a Norse God. It was a foolish record to try and break that. But after Mongolia God only knows the state of his biology. He may have a Super Liver. He might have developed a secondary liver as a defence mechanism to protect his body from the abuse.
Cathy: And I don't even want to get into the Bibliomancy thing.
Craig: So I can never go on vacation with Dups either, then?
Cathy: You can go if it's just you and Dups. You and Dups with other people is not allowed.
Craig: So me, Dups, Seamus and Myrick, for example...
Cathy: Are you insane?
Craig: So that's a no.
Cathy: The only way it happens is if OM went along. It's the only conceivable way I could see you coming back alive.
Craig: Frankly, I still wouldn't give good odds.
Cathy: Well, if you insist on going just let me know so I can take out a large life insurance policy in advance.
Craig: I feel the love, babe.
Cathy: If you're going to go kill yourself, then at least I need to have the money to lead a comfortable life as a widow.
7 comments:
hee hee... so... when can I expect you over for a vacation Craig... trust me, it'll be quite restful :)
Hmmm that does make me wonder what a vacation with you, seamus, myrick and OM would be like... sounds like a riot. Literally :)
"Craig: So me, Dups, Seamus and Myrick, for example..."
Oooh! A road trip would be fun!
I would insist that we travel in a red vintage convertable.
...which my father still has, by the way.
Cathy is looking over my shoulder lamenting "Why am I not surprised they are not getting it?"
Ted's a biological freak of nature who's sheer size ensures superior absorbtion capacity.
Cathy doesn't know OM very well, my bet would be on OM to beat Ted (if anyone could). There was that bet she won, a supper at the keg...oh to see the look on her opponent's face when she downed the 100th shot of vodka.
Cathy, when it comes to Craig friends, he's doomed.
Oh sweet jesus - it wasn't shots of vodka, it was beer (100 shots of beer in 100 minutes- the Centurian, big drinking game int he dorms at UofS - not recommended, very harsh hangover, cause you don't have time to drink any water, and there's no ice in beer.)- I'd be seriously dead if I drank 100 shots of vodka in one sitting. With no bathroom breaks. Sheer madness.
And I must admit, I was a little surprise by the apparent potencey of these "Golden Hammers" - 4 shots of scotch and 4 pints of Strongbow, over the course of an evening? I could do that. Andrea could so do that too. She's replace her blood volume with guiness on a number of occasions,(I've seen it) and I've managed to polish off 6 pints in a session, granted that was back at peak tolerance levels, pre-baby.
I'm in for the trip - how about that winnie tour of ireland - we could get into pretty good trouble there. And reasure Cathy that I'd not only get you home alive, I'd also be able to get you out of jail, if the need arises.
And I'll mention for the record, I was never invited along for the penis mobile road trips....
Seamus, get started on a new mixed CD!
lol - it would be fun, tho'. Wonder how Hubby would react to the news that I was going off on a drinking adventure with you four... course, I'll blame it on Cathy insisting that I go to drunksit.
What's the story on the golden hammers - there must be something I'm missing.
I say
Cathy’s problem isn’t with drunken debauchery. I’ve been drunk two, maybe three times in my life. I went through university with you crowd and managed to avoid it, so it shouldn’t be much more difficult now.
In her estimation OM could be hammered and in all likelihood still more sensible than Dups, Seamus and Myrick when sober. She loves the three of them, really. But she also realizes, as do any who know them, that they tend to skirt the edge of the rational world. Some (cough Myrick) might have, in fact, abandoned the whole concept of the rational world quite some time ago. Others (cough Dups) have been walking that fine, fine line for quite some time.
So the trouble isn't the booze - the trouble is what their warped little minds would come up with as entertaining for a few days. That's what's she's worried about.
Having said that, she did make the offer at lunch time that if the five of us wanted to do a road trip for a weekend, she’d happily watch over Little Man for you, OM. Not to Ireland, alas. That might be pushing it. But the window is there, apparently.
So, all we need is a time, place, large enough convertible and game plan. Oh, and extra life insurance for me, apparently.
See I now have visions of all of you doing your own version of Lure of the Labrador Wild.
And we know how that ended.
(Note to OM: the only female who made the same trek later, did so with style, grace, had a great time and came out none the worse for wear.)
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